It's been a while since Joshua was born yet I have no time at all to update this blog.
Like I said before, it was pretty hectic these last two weeks and for me, I've got a very short term roommate who was my mom.
So, it was a first time for my mom coming here alone by herself while we were sharing room by just the two of us. To be honest, at first, I felt nothing like mother-and-daughter feeling about sharing after not seeing each other for quite sometime. It might be because I'm not used to talk and share with my her. The situation is when I call her and try to talk, both of us are talking and we finally end up with arguing each other. That's why I'd rather talk general things than my problems or issues I'm facing here.
But then, mother's instinct could not be eliminated. She finally knew everything as she saw what I'm doing everyday and what other people have done. I'm not going to mention the issue though, as it was quite confidential, yet, the main point is she understood what I'm feeling.
I didn't need to tell her everything, but she could figure out herself. She could see from my perspective and I was totally glad for that. Now, I can see how a mother is really care about her children and she is actually the one who can totally understand her children's feelings. And without any shame I must admit that I just discovered and experienced this motherly-instinct thing.
And now that brings me with feeling homesick just after her return to Indo last night. Since I was here, I'd never had such a feeling. I was alright before and after I came back from Indo. But yesterday I was suddenly feeling so sad. I felt that I've been left alone here while my mother has gone away. I felt like being a 5-year old girl who was afraid of being alone in the middle of a big shopping centre. I felt like I was desperately finding my mom so that I can go home with her.
I miss my home, my dad, my mom, my big sister...
I wanna go home and never come back again...
I wish I could do that...
Just let me go home...
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